Potty Training 101

In the last couple of months, we bought Taj a potty of his own to practice sitting on and become familiar with. He took to it right away, was very interested in observing us using our big potty, liked being read to while sitting on it, and even had a few successful pees! We would put him on the potty usually 2-3 times a day in the beginning, then taught him the words "peepee", "potty", and "poopoo". Then once I got to reading on a more structured potty training, I taught Taji the difference between "wet" and "dry", began reading potty books to him and showed him the "Once Upon a Potty" dvd, which he loves to watch (these were all great for getting him to sit on the potty for a period of time!)

After all the "prepping", the little boys underwear was bought, and the painters plastic was placed on our carpet and rug areas, Taj was ready to begin the 4-day Potty Boot Camp- Basic Training (by Suzanne Riffel). I said to myself, "why the heck not?!". He's been showing all the signs of readiness, he's almost 17 months old, and why not attempt to have a go since I am home with him on a regular basis and can move about easily with my preggo belly........ Here is our Taji Toddler modeling his big boy underwear (imagine hearing the tune from the "Rocky" Movie), it's like he's preparing for the ultimate battle!

Day 1: Solely consisted of undies (lots and lots of undies!) We said bye bye to diapers for the day (except nap time and bedtime). The timer went off every 10 minutes for "potty time". In between potty time, we had quiet play and I tempted Taji with his water cup, juice, smoothie, anything liquid. He enjoyed sitting on the potty holding on to his puppy and dog buddies, and we alternated between story time and dvd time (Baby Einstein Old MacDonald -his favorite! and the Once Upon a Potty 15 min movie.) He would go 10 minutes between his potty breaks, and the potty breaks would be anywhere from 5-15 minutes long.

If at the end of the 10 minutes, his undies were dry he would get a sticker and big praise, then go right on the potty! If his undies were wet or had poop in them, I would say "Uh Oh, you had an accident!", and "oh no, yucky, you went in your underwear..... now we have to clean it up!" As I changed his undies and cleaned up the mess the whole time I kept emphasizing how pee or poop go in the potty. Then we did a set of "potty drills." I took him by his hand and we would practice walking really fast to the potty from different parts of the house, I would help him pull down his undies and sit on the potty. We did this 10 times during the drill to help him memorize going to the potty.

If after sitting on the potty he had a success (either pee or poop) then he got a reward (which was usually a little toy of some sort), an even bigger praise, and we happily poured the pee or poop into the tiolet and Taji excitedly said "bye bye pee pee (or poo poo)" and flushed the tiolet! He got a big kick out of this and was so excited every time he had a success!

At the end of Day 1, mama was super tired (we couldnt leave the house all day AND it was so freakin hot!), but Taj broke even with successes and accidents. The Grand Total of the day was 8 accidents in his undies, 8 dry undies, 2 pees in the potty, 1 poop in the potty, AND if you can believe this, at the end of the day, after one of our drills he actually went over to the potty himself, said "pee pee", sat on it (with my help), and went pee! Because he had his huge moment, and initiated going to the potty and successfully peeing in it, we made a BIG DEAL about this and proceeded to Day 2 of Potty Boot Camp....... the "Naked Intervals."

The next day, Day 2, Taj went naked. No undies, no diapers..... and lots of lots plastic on the floor and rug rolled up! Brad and I were really nervous about this. Supposedly, the whole point of going naked is that Taj is supposed to have an easier time getting to the potty without having to pull down his undies, and if he has an accident it's suppose to make him feel uncomfortable if he has pee running down his leg. I have to say, although it was nerve-wrecking, since we continued to use the timer (every 15-20 minutes now), Taj had success going poop twice in the potty, going pee a few times on the potty..... but just as many accidents on the floor!! And when he had an accident (like poop or a pee puddle) I felt as if I was cleaning up after a puppy! Even though there was no laundry to do, it was messier and stinkier!
The following photos are of Taj happily peering into his potty after going poo poo in the potty!!

Taj definitely got excited as he observed himself peeing in the potty, or afterwards checking the potty to find there was poop in it, it was a big moment for him, and he was soooo proud and clapped for himself!!! But when he had an accident (whether in his undies or naked) he didn't always notice and it didn't always register. Maybe a couple times he would say "Uh Oh" or start crying from being uncomfortable..... but not every time.

Day 3-4: Who am I kidding....... should I even count these days as Potty Boot Camp? By this point, Taj had only initiated 1x (the very first day), and was very irregular with his successes and accidents. He didn't mind sitting on the potty but he also wasn't making any effort to go to his potty when he should have. I'm not going to say I caved or gave up on the potty boot camp, but let's just say I had to modify it (for my own sanity). Since we wanted to go out and do a few things over the weekend (friday nite date nite, and a pumpkin patch excursion on Sunday), while at home Taj wore undies under his slip-on diapers. We continued using the timer, and every 20 minutes we had Potty Time. He continued to pee in his undies/ diaper, and he also peed and pooped in the potty. At the end of our weekend I came to a conclusion about his potty training progress and whether he was a candidate for Potty Boot Camp Graduation. First off, due to his age, Taj can't quite tell when he has to go pee or potty, he is not consistent about self-initiating, his "puppy", "potty", and "poopoo" all sound the same so we don't know whether he is asking for his puppy, potty, or telling us he is about to go poop. These were the big road blocks on our road to Potty Training success.

However, i think potty boot camp was ultimately a stepping stone in success because Taj continues to want to sit on the potty, uses the vocabulary regularly, is excited and proud when he does have a success.......... so we decided to continue the timer and have regular Potty Times. When at home, I will continue to have Taj wear his undies under his slip-on diaper so he can feel when he's wet and then maybe he will get better at verbalizing it. But when we are out, or on a trip, or in the car it will be difficult to have him wear the undies (because of sanitary reasons) and use a timer. We have a smaller travel potty we will bring with us, so wherever we go (esp on our Big Sur-Monterey Road Trip this week) we will have potty time before/ after going places. My hope is that within the next couple of months we will be able to differentiate between his puppy, poo poo, and potty words, and Taj will learn how to pull his undies or slip-on diaper on and off, and comfortably sit on the potty without our help. Maybe if we don't see progression by his 20th or 21st month, I will put the painter's plastic on the floor again and attempt Potty Boot Camp. Can't blame me for trying to have one boy out of diapers before our 2nd baby boy arrives, but I admit I was ambitious! I don't want the potty to become aversive to him, and we cannot continue living in a home with plastic on the floors. Yet Taj is getting it and I think in no time he will independently run over to the potty and excitedly announce when he has to go!

Confessions of a SAHM - Part 1

This is first-time Stay At-Home Mom (7 months pregnant along with a toddler) checking in for the first of many confessions. I thought I would miss working and all the different interactions. Nope. I don’t miss waking up at the crack of dawn (I have never been a morning person), or the panicked rush out the door, the commute, the stressful meetings, the endless report writing and testing, the crazy parents and teachers, missing my baby and feeling guilty I wasn’t with him, and then lastly, the dreadful daycare pick-up and mad dash to get home and spend some quality time before bedtime. No thank you. I realize now that maybe I wasn’t so good at balancing work and being a new mom. Even part time, I felt pulled in too many directions.

Life is simple now. No stress, no schedules (except the ones I make), and more time to simply enjoy life and “live.” Most importantly, no feeling like there aren’t enough hours in the day. I love not knowing what day of the week it is. The nagging guilt has flown out the window. I love that my #1 priority and focus is on my baby (soon-to-be babies), husband, and home. Time passes slowly, which is godsent right now with our little ones. I’m living life on my own terms….. no alarm clocks, no deadlines, no time consuming work. Granted, there are days my patience is tested to the max, and no 3pm or 5pm end of work day for me…. but I wouldn’t trade it for the world. At the end of each day I have my precious memories of special moments with Taj, going on adventures, learning something new through his eyes, him learning something new or accomplishing a skill, and best of all, THE FAMILY TIME. Family time in the morning when we sleep in, eat breakfast together, and play before Brad goes into the office. Family time during lunch when Brad comes home to eat and hang out. Family time in the evening, when we eat dinner together most nights, play, and tuck Taji into bed. Even family time the entire day, when Brad decides to take a day off spontaneously. How lucky are we that we get this much family time, and this is just the weekdays I am referring to!

Interestingly, what most SAHMS won’t admit is that it can get a bit isolating and boring (yes, I just said those words!!!)…. But again I believe it is a choice and up to the mom to make the effort to plan for the day, for the week, and put herself out there socially. I balance my time being a mommy and also being me and being a wife. When Friday rolls around I look forward to my "me" time and date nites or our group dates! I get to see my girlfriends more often, whether its a girl nite or a playdate with our kids. I don’t miss having to put on make-up and getting dressed up every day, but I do miss the attention and compliments from my co-workers. I don’t miss the politics and drama, but I do miss the friendships that have drifted. As with any new chapter, friendships are tested. Those that are invested and committed for the long haul remain and grow with us.

Alas, looking back the only regret I have is that I didn’t become a stay at-home mom right when my 1st son was born. I didn’t know back then what I know now. In a bizarre philosophical kind of way, everything in my past has prepared me and led me to this. I can’t tell you how lucky I feel to have had my 20’s to play, party, study, travel the world, and had that special 5 year couples time with Brad before embarking on parenthood. Having worked as a nanny, behavior therapist for children with Autism, private consultant to families, and a 4 year career as a School Psychologist and Counselor have all given me the ridiculously useful skills and tools to be a good mom. I am my son’s teacher, potty trainer, activity director, researcher, family gourmet chef, house manager, party planner, events coordinator, and travel agent (notice I didn’t say housekeeper LOL). It’s almost like I am evolving and growing on a whole new level! Would I have had the time and energy to teach my toddler how to recognize and read simple words, how to potty train him at a young age, to attend Storytimes and foster his love for books, to cook him healthy meals from scratch that nourish his brain, or go to mommy & me classes and have playdates with all these new moms and kids, if I was working right now? No way Jose! Would I have as easy and enjoyable of a second pregnancy if I was stressing out at work? Probably not. Would I even be half as good of a mom? Maybe not, and definitely not up to the standard I aspire to be. Even my creative outlets of photography, design, travel, cooking, and baking have been reawakened.

With everything I set my mind to, I put in 105%, and this is no different. I have researched and narrowed down the best parks, the best nature areas, indoor activity centers, mommy & me classes, and ideas for playdates….and most are free! I have come to find that our local public libraries are our best friend, the Storytimes (more like circle time/ music time/ story time) are FABULOUS! Orange County really is a mecca for moms with young babies, because there are so many resources, places to visit, things to do, and other moms to do it with! Never a dull moment, and always something happening around the corner! We love the mommy & me classes (conveniently located at the CYC just down the street from us!), the farm, the local nature centers, the local playgrounds, and Frogg’s Bounce House. Every month I have a slew of new parks and museums on the list to check out with Taj, and every week I plan a day trip of some sort (a new park, zoo, etc.) along with playdates. The weekends are usually reserved for family time with daddy and long-distance trips.

This is what our week usually looks like:

Mondays & Weds - In the AM: walk to storytime at library (play and check out books & rent movies for us grown-ups), Mommy & Me gymnastics class (Mondays) or Mommy & Me “Music Together” class (Weds), Naptime & late lunch. Then in the PM: play at home or run errands or go to playground before dinner

Tuesdays & Thurs - In the AM: Open Play at Frogg’s Bounce House with other toddlers & moms , Naptime & late lunch. In the PM: Playground, playdate, or day trip of some sort

Fridays- In the AM: free morning to play at home or go outside, Lunch & Naptime. In the PM: Sam comes to babysit & play with Taj (while mama has “me” time and we parents get a date nite)

There you have it! The beauty is that I can change up our weekly schedule as much as we like, depending on how active we feel, or whether we are sick or tired. There’s also the perfectly good excuse to just stay home and cuddle! There are always make-up classes and plenty of other storytimes and playdates to catch on a different day. We can be as spontaneous as we like! All of this exploring, learning about the many resources and things-to-do, as well as meeting moms of toddlers & newborns is helping me visualize and plan out how I will balance taking care of my TWO boys come December! Stay tuned for that upcoming confession.........

Grover Brothers

Awww, here come the Grover boys! Or will it be more like..... Uh Oh! Here come the Grover boys!!! ha ha! I'm sure we will get both scenarios at one point or another! About a week ago I had this amazing dream about my 2 boys.... in my dream they were both riding in a red wagon, like 2 peas in a pod, one with reddish strawberry blond hair, the other with really light blond hair. They both had the sweetest smiles and I felt overcome with so much love and pride. I woke up from that dream smiling, and very excited for the arrival of Jax and the 2 boys meeting and forming a brotherly bond. Got me thinking and dreaming even more about what our future might look like. I started thinking about our own "brother relationships" within the Grover and Dlab families. Maybe that's why we are being blessed with 2 boys, guess it runs in the family!! Brad is one of 4 children, but he and his brother Rodney are the youngest, exactly 24 months apart to the exact day (they share a birthday!). Their baby and childhood pictures come close to what photos of Taj and Jax may look like (not only because they will only be 19 months apart, but don't tell me you can't see the resemblance of baby Brad and Taj in the first few pics!)

This is what we have to look forward to when we bring Baby Jax home from the hospital and Taji may try to cuddle with him!: (the baby is Brad if you are wondering!)
Here's more of the Grover brothers:
And in the below pic, this is where Brad (on the left) looks so much like Taj..... similar smiles! :

Boys will be Boys..... we have this to look forward to....... the boys fighting over toys. A piece of advice I recently heard is when you have 2 boys (especially young and close in age) be prepared to get 2 of everything......

And hopefully as they get older, they will have the same shared interests like Brad and Rodney had.......

This next set of photos absolutely cracks me up!!!! It's the Dlab brothers!!! My dad and his brother Jura are 3 years apart (my dad is the older brother). Growing up the poor boys were succumbed to my grandmother's crazy fashion sense!!! She loved to dress her boys like identical twins, and so many of the outfits look like costumes but they actually wore them out to public! The photos are sooooo adorable however a good warning for me to not go overboard like this with my sons!

Even as handsome young men, they continued to sport the same hair!!! I'm sure this makes my dad shudder, sorry Tati but I just couldn't resist!!

We have so much to look forward to! SO excited to take pics of my boys in coordinating outfits (don't worry I won't make them into twins)...... i'm getting inspired just thinking about it :)

The Final Stretch

We are in the 3rd trimester!!! Two thirds of the way to becoming a Grover family of 4! How crazy fast is this pregnancy flying by?! Its definitely much more familiar and easier 2nd time around..... or maybe I'm just fortunate for the time being! Not so happy with my weight though, 28 weeks and 30 lb. weight gain! Don't even think of pinching my pudgy cheeks!! I'm already tipping the scale compared to my 1st pregnancy. How could it be when I am constantly chasing after Taji, going to my weekly pilates, way more active than last time, and even eating healthy? You got me.... apparently it's all Jax's fault! Ha ha, my sweet baby boy Jax you keep growing and take as much room as you like, I am just teasing! As long as you come out happy and healthy, I will sacrifice myself to cankles, bloating, swelling, and thunder thighs! I am very happy I passed the glucose (gestational diabetes) test with flying colors, no concerns there..... although we did have a bladder infection false alarm, but everything turned out normal. A huge relief since this exact day last pregnancy I ended up in Labor & Delivery due to pre-term labor caused by a bladder infection! Thank goodness history has not repeated itself.
(at 28 wks, first day of my 3rd Trimester..... still glowing, sans make-up,

and getting chubbier by the minute!)

But seriously this weight gain is slowing me down! The worst is when I am holding Taj and I drop my keys or my dear son throws something on the floor and I have to bend down to pick it up. Talk about hard-core squats, to the point that I almost topple over! Looks like dada will be taking over bathtime soon, and looks like Mr. Taj will need to get used to hand-holding versus being held. The most difficult part of the trimester I am in now is that my first baby boy is getting VERY clingy to me, he's so much a mama's boy. I feel like a mama kangaroo, balancing a teeny baby in my belly with my big baby attached to my hip. Apparently, at this age, Taj knows something is up and is very protective over me. He always points out my growing belly saying "baby", calls out for me wherever we are (even when he's with daddy), and is extremely cuddly and lovey dovey. Ok, so now back to our second cuddlebug, Mr. Jax, the little man that loves to crawl up on my right side underneath my rib...... making me look lopsided! His kicks and prods are becoming more intense and he has lots of energy. Still no acid reflux, and just this past week I had heartburn maybe 3 times at most (caused by no other than too many tomato products.) Now if we can only get on with the Fall weather..... I hate these warm temperatures..... I'm beginning to get annoyed with California! Where is the cool brisk Fall air so I can start wearing my comfy leggings, long-sleeve maternity shirts, scarfs, and soft sweaters?!!!

the bare belly:

Our Scenic September

A recap of our September: Labor Day bowling, family time with cousins Chloe, Sierra, and Cayden, & Grandma Sue, Bachelorette party wknd for mama, two LA daytrips (to drop off and pick up dada from LAX), and the Disaster Preparedness Expo. Dada Brad traveled to Norway and UK for a very successful business trip, and this weekend he is in Arizona for a bachelor party. Taj had many "firsts" this month (bowling, saying "I Love You", peeing in the potty, and first haircut), and made his molar teething (2 on bottom, and 2 on top) look like a piece of cake!

We went on a lot of hikes and relished the nature we found. The difference between New York and California is that in NY the nature surrounds you in every direction. In California, you literally have to drive out to go look for it, unless you just want the beach. So while Brad was working or on his business trip overseas, Taj and I mapped out our adventures and explorers we became! We discovered some very serene secret spots in Orange County, ones that we will return to for more hiking and playing in. I love what my friend Nana wrote on her blog a while back, about seizing every moment with our little ones and getting out there and taking them to new places. It's so true! To think I grew up in Orange County and there is still so much to uncover! I love to take my "Curious George" on new adventures and field trips every week, its so much fun! Taj LOVES to walk, run, explore, and look for cool things (especially rocks!) so we are definitely doing a lot of that while I still have the energy during this pregnancy! He also LOVES to sweetly hold our hands while walking :) We have not only been active outdoors, but indoors as well! Our new hot spot is Open Play at Frogg's Bounce House (LOVE this place, lots of soft bouncy houses for Taj to jump in and slide on, I feel like a kid myself when I go!) We also started going to a Mommy & Me Tiny Tumblers gymnastics class every Monday morning (this week Taji learned how to do a somersault.... with mama's help!). Through our playground outings, walks, and gymnastic class we met new play buddies Nico, Nicholas, and Maddy, and had playdates with Princess Brooklyn and my sister's friend's little guy (who we are playing with for the first time this afternoon!) Here are the highlights of our September:

Strolling on the beach, hiking around Pirate's Cove in CDM:

Environmental Nature Center (Newport Beach): Various trees, plants, a creek with waterfalls, many hiking trails, and Taj was in rock heaven!

Fullerton Arboretum: various trees, plants, flowers, waterfalls, creeks, ducks, and cool maze-like paths!Will Rogers Historic State Park in Pacific Palisades (just off of Sunset Blvd, in LA): hiking, kite flying, horses, deer, and sunset with Auntie Brina :)

During our 2 LA day trips we visited with Kristen and her kiddos Ella & Will, had special time with Auntie Brina, and I had a wonderful reunion lunch with my dear high school best friend Iva who I haven't seen in 13 years!

We also visited the farm this month, one of Taji's favorite places. There were many new babies to see: newborn piglets, baby calf, and baby chicks! Taj loves pointing out all the animals and doing the animal sounds!

On Fridays, our babysitter and Taj's play buddy Samantha comes over to play and take Taji to the park, while I go to Pilates, run errands, and Brad & I go on our date nights! Since Taj turned One, we have fully taken advantage of our treasured date nights! We love to explore new restaurants, love our time to connect, and often times it feels like the old pre-marriage/pre-baby days :)

What I love about Sam is that she is super responsible and knows exactly what Taj likes and doesn't like. She feeds him, bathes him, and puts him to bed without a whine from him, and he sleeps like an angel. I'm glad he feels this comfortable with her! I also really like that she sends me text updates and snaps these adorable pics of him while playing:

And now, here is this month's Taj updates! We like to describe Taj as our Tajmanian devil and loverboy all-in-one. As our loverboy, he LOVES to give hugs and kisses, and cuddles with his favorite stuffed animal buddies:

As the Tajmanian devil, he makes big messes around the house and climbs furniture (we are trying work on his love for throwing things)!

He learned how to kick a ball, is a total Bookworm (we often find him sitting quietly reading through his books!), can complete his color and shapes puzzles pretty independently, and his new favorite words he loves to say are: hoop, rock, juice, "gogurt" (yogurt), butt paste, elephant, zebra, bear, fire truck, "mamoe"(lawnmower), potty, "nite nite", fishie, phone, "aminals" (animals), dinosaur, circle, square, and baby. Its like every month he picks up 10-20 new words! He loves the Old MacDonald/ Head, Shoulders, Knees, & Toes/ One, Two, Buckle My Shoe songs, and fills in the end words! Taj now knows where his mouth, arm, "boobies" (he loves to point out mine!), hair, and legs are. He does the animal sounds for elephant, horse, mouse, pig, and frog! As far as the Your Baby Can Read program goes, Taj's motivation goes up and down with the cards, although he can identify and read "hi", "eyes", "nose", "elephant", and "dog". It's hard to tell because he gets distracted and gets goofy. This month, Taj was a much better eater than a napper (he is irregular and prefers only 1 nap a day.) He loves smoothies, juices, and eats practically everything we are eat so its very easy these days (fingers crossed), and he really loves my healthy homecookin'!