Its really really REAL now!!! We are NEW YORK STATE Residents! It was the 6th month anniversary of our move to Bemus Point, New York beginning of December. Within the 6 months, we switched over to NY licenses, car license plates (look how yellow they are!), and almost complete in transferring over all of our important matters, including health insurance. Our only Californian "souvenir" we've decided to hold on to are our cell phone numbers!
Its a pivotal half way year mark of our new life in New York. We've faced a whole bunch of ups and downs, have had incredible amount of support as well as a some backlash. This journey and inter-continental move of our's was not for the light-hearted, that's for sure. But after all these months, we feel like we've gained a much better quality of life.
1) We've succeeded in slowing down the clock. In my blog post back in May, that you can find here, I discussed our reasons for why we wanted to move. The main one was to slow down the clock and enjoy our children as they grow. We felt like our lives were on fast-forward in a fast-paced environment. By moving to a smaller town, surrounded by lots of nature, and especially in a 4 season climate, our lives have slowed down and are less stressful. Its funny but a 4 season climate actually makes the year go by slower. Every season brings different activities, lifestyle, even how you dress, eat, and socialize. Even though summer was only 4 months ago, it feels like it was a long time ago because our environment looks different than what it was in the summer, plus we had a Fall season in between too. It feels like a long time ago that we were running around in our swimsuits and flip flops, because of the drop in temperatures since September! Nevertheless, we accomplished our goal of spending more time as a family, creating new memories, going on new adventures, and trying new things because of the change of environment.
2) We LOVE our house. Those with kids who say they don't want or choose not to have a house of their own.... they are lying! LOL In my opinion, when you have kids, having an actual house is a must! Its a necessity, and a luxury at the same time! The house is the foundation of the family. It is the structure that keeps the family grounded, yet allows them to grow, flourish, dream, and spend lots of time together.... comfortably. Our house is a dream come true for us. We knew when we saw that "for sale by owner" sign in front of it 1.5 years ago, that this house was meant for us. Now living in it for the last 6 months, I can't imagine not having all this space with our 2 boys. It has everything that we could ever want, and will grow with us as the boys grow into teenagers. We love to entertain, and this house has already turned into an entertainer's paradise, and neighborhood gathering place. I can't imagine not having a game room for all of the kids' toys, and space they can call their own.... especially when their little friends come over, and with their bounce house and train tracks.... oh boy! It feels so great to have all the kids stuff not dominate the rest of the house. We actually have a real living room/ family room, library/office, and a big kitchen that will double in size when we knock out the wall next month and build our dream and way functional kitchen in the open floor plan. I can't believe we have a real 2 car garage, where its a breeze to get in and out of the car through the house, and to bring groceries in from! We love our lake view and our backyard, as well as the privacy and space from neighbors. We don't even need a fence. There's nothing we don't love about our house, I could go on and on.... especially with our added personal touch and design. In hindsight though, having a house is A LOT of work. Even though its practically brand new, we've had to replace and update some things that would eventually have to be replaced due to wear and tear. Since the beginning of Winter we had to deal with pesky rodents, replacing the stove, replacing the water heater and some furnace/ plumbing matters. Some housing issues aren't all crucial, but since Brad and I are "perfectionistas- homeowners" we prefer quality and beauty because that's how we like to live. Quality and beauty doesn't come cheap, and we're hoping once we are done with our remodeling project this summer, we will enjoy all the fruits of our labor, hard work, and patience :)
3) Keep your family close, but your friends EVEN CLOSER. Not everybody is going to agree with decisions that we make, or understand why we do what we do. This goes out to all the families who want to live their dream: "Do what works for you, what you believe in, and what makes your lives easier and happier, regardless of the judgement you may face. Nobody said our fate is set in stone, so take charge of your destiny! We only have one life, and a short period of time to enjoy the family we created." In our situation, we've discovered that our friends (both in California and New York) have been some of our biggest and most devoted supporters. The good friends that we left behind, including those that Brad grew up with here in New York, have admired us and been proud of us since the beginning. Many of them actually grew up in this kind of environment (or on the East Coast) and they "get it." Our Bemus friends have all told us how positive we are and continue to be, and they love our perspective and our adventurous spirit. Its been a long and difficult road with my family, who were probably the most upset and sad to see us move to the other side of the country. I am really glad though of how invested they are in our boys, how much we Skype, and that they are coming to visit this summer (I also got to see my sister spontaneously in Ohio the other weekend.... that post coming soon!) Then, little did we know that we were going to have to lower our expectations for Brad's family living here. That was another sting. As for our friends in Bemus, they have become our family. They are such an awesome network, resource, entertainment.... for anything and everything! The good friends living in CA, we are in constant communication, and are making plans to visit each other. Some have actually moved themselves, so it seems some are on the same kind of journey as us. The only thing that stinks about living in Bemus, is that we don't have my sister 30 minutes away like we were used to in California. She has always been our go-to person, and the most committed and devoted family we have. She loves our boys like they are her own and in a drop of dime she is there to babysit them and spend time with them. Thanks to her, Brad and I were able to have overnight dates and mini-vacations sans kids. Come to think of it, the other thing that stinks is that we don't have our beloved Sam, our babysitter we had in California. She is the only sitter so far I would trust to take care of the boys overnight or watch them while Brad and I take a weekend trip somewhere. When it comes down to it though, we are thankful for the 2 high school girls we alternately call to babysit for us while we go on dates, that we've actually had since we moved here. We are still learning a valuable lesson in, that everything takes time, not everything is going to be perfect, and not everything/ everyone is replaceable.
(No pun intended!) Personally, since I didn't grow up in a 4 season climate, I have fully embraced the cold, and so have the boys! I love all the accessories, and all my cool new boots! I just feel way more comfortable dressing for this season. And snow is way more exciting than rain! Even driving in it isn't so bad, its actually softer and more exciting. Maybe the cold isn't as bad as some dramatically make it out to be...... hmmm, when you have a 72 degree home at all times, and 4 wheel drive SUV with heated seats and snow tires, and an on-call person who we pay to plow our driveway.... life isn't too shabby or cold! There's something magical about it snowing, and its pretty nice to get all cozy at home!
5) HOLD the stereotypes, EXTRA open-mindedness please. Ah, another wise lesson learned. So we've moved from California to an East Coast state. We've visited 2 other nearby states, and even driven outside of the US. And guess what?!!! There are many (and let me repeat) MANY areas that look like Orange County! Crazy, but true. Its all in the commercial development, the strip malls, the modern Italian-French architecture designed shopping malls, the freeways, etc. There's tract housing communities, gated communities, luxury condo and apartment communities everywhere. Even the SAME.EXACT store chains, restaurant chains, etc. Leave it to the builders to spread monotony around. Besides the gorgeous coastline of Southern and Northern California (and my favorite gems Laguna Beach and Carmel-by-the Sea), there's an Orange County in every state. There are also great people, upscale areas, white trash people, and ghetto areas in every state! Since moving, I feel like I've evolved. There is no one state that is superior than another, thats a false judgement. You can find highly educated, well-traveled, and cultured people everywhere, it just depends if they are drawn to you! LOL We have made just as many diverse friends here, that we have in California. All of them travel, and all of them have high standards for their children and the life they live. I've even surprised myself in meeting new friends who speak other languages, have spouses who are from different cultures, and most of these girls are originally from another state (or country!), so automatically we have had something in common from the get-go. This whole move and beginning of our life on the East Coast has made me feel way more open-minded, less judgmental, and more connected! Its also easy for us to travel to more places because we are 45 minutes away from a neighboring state, 1.5 hours from a neighboring country, 4 international airports within 2 hours driving distance to choose from, and we have The City less than an hour flight from us. From suburbia, lake resort areas, tract developments, farms, Amish country, mountains, and big cities..... we have it all at our finger tips. And the best part about living and seeing the sights of the East Coast? The history!
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